Friday, December 14, 2012

Mourning Connecticut: The Rules for Living in a War Zone*


I cannot
bear it
how will
they?

We are
monsters

it is time
we stopped
pretending to
anything else

it is time
we admit
that and act
accordingly

for if we were
honest about
who we are

we would teach
our children
the things they
need to know
when living in
a war zone --

how to duck
and take cover

how to roll in
a tight ball
with arms
covering to protect
against head shots

what to do when
taken hostage –
don’t look the
shooter in the
eye – just keep
your head down
and try to be as
invisible as you
can – either that
or try to make
him (and what
do we do to our
boys that they
can become this?)
love you – see you,
really see you –
no – better to just
try to be invisible
– if your small
self isn’t enough
for him to love you,
what chance have you?

how to be very
very quiet and still
in the face of real
danger – blending
into the background –
like the prey you are

how, once the shooting
starts, to play dead

how to run –
not in a straight
line, but zigzag
so you’re harder
to get a bead on

why, oh why,
do we not teach
them how to
survive a war
zone?

For that is
where they
live

___________
*It is perhaps foolish or even dangerous to vent one's feelings in the wake of tragedy, for it is only raw emotion that can speak at such times.  While God is not mentioned by name here, this is actually a form of prayer -- lament.  I have no other language now.

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